I have this picture that I took and edited a bit for dramatic effect…and I absolutely love the photo, but am so torn on how to caption it…I am wearing my Collared set, my prized Tiffany & Co necklace and bracelet and I have connected them together, making them look like a collar with leash…My Collared set has such deep personal meaning for me that it’s often very difficult to write about without getting overly gushy and very wordy. They weren’t originally purchased for our Lifestyle, not the necklace at least…
My darling Husband knew how much I adored Tiffany & Co. (this is so much a fact that it got me into serious trouble earlier in our relationship, but that is another time and another blog post) and while we didn’t have the money for a brand new piece, one bright sunny May in 2013 my beloved sent me on and errand. I had been nagging Him a bit about a necklace that I had found on craigslist, but knew our finances and didn’t put much serious effort into it. When he sent me out with our kiddo to a small town about an hour away from us I didn’t think too much of it, as we have family out there, but on the way, I got a text message to go ahead and go to the little shop that He knew had the necklace I had been eyeing and to get it, “Happy Mother’s Day”. I squealed and happily did just as He had so lovingly instructed. That day was one that is pure magic as that I was also able to have lunch with my dear grandparents, and now that my Gram has Departed, any memory with Her in it is deeply treasured.
My bracelet I asked for a few months after we came into the Lifestyle, and right before our birthdays in Oct 2014. I had just received a birthday gift (money!) from a relative and had been wanting to get something to symbolize being Collared; that I was so in love with this new found freedom, that I wanted to find a compliment to my necklace and dedicate the two as my Collared Set. At the time, my Lover and I were exploring our Dynamic, and after discussing it with my beloved Husband and Master, He agreed that I could get a bracelet and devote it in part to my connection with my Long Distance. I set out to searching on eBay and within hours had won the bidding on a retired style bracelet that was the exact twin to my necklace. It came in the mail, wrapped in it’s signature teal bag and with shaking hands, I brought it to Master to have helped putting it on.
A great many couples in the Lifestyle put a tremendous amount of weight into Collaring and the ceremonies that can take place, as they should. In the D/s community, a Collared Pair is as respected as a Married pair; She is His and He is Hers and for the most part, that’s that. As they may have play partners, they are each other’s soul concern. Many consider this bond deeper than legal marriage and to some respect I agree; legal marriage is for everyone else. It’s for the community to see, respect and understand. (It helps with taxes too!) Being Collared is for Us; for Our understanding, Our depth, Our connection. Like I stated before, some choose to make Their Collaring ceremonies elaborate and surrounded by family and friends (Lifestyle oriented/Understanding of course), other’s chose to make it a very private and romantic affair alone in their bedrooms/play rooms; We were in the kitchen and I’m pretty sure Master was making tea. The clasp on the bracelet is very tight and my wrist is very small, so after a bit of fidgeting and choking up three links on the chain, my bracelet was on. I was teary, We were smiling. He kissed my forehead and we made tea. It was simple and incredibly understated, but We already knew that We were going to spend all of everything together, this was just a more deeper way of showing it. The bracelet brought about a sense of unity, a set, something refined and incredibly strong. Looking back on it now, I believe that I’ve always worn it more for my Husband than for my Lover, merely because it symbolizes the strides that we have made not only as a married pair but as a Collared Pair.
I can say that now, after quite a few things have come to pass, that I do not wear the bracelet as a symbol of my status with my long distance Lover, as our relationship has changed and my submission is no longer required. I wear my bracelet and necklace now as a set in devotion to my Husband, the Master of my Heart. I had to take off the bracelet for some time, out of respect for my healing, but when I put it back on with new dedication to my Sir, my Beloved Husband, it felt as it should have, Safe, humbling, Home. I don’t always wear them together, sometimes substituting another bracelet or necklace, but there is always evidence of my sterling devotion. On the rare occasions when I do take them both off, their weight is consistently felt, and though I may fidget from time to time, reaching for what is not there, I understand in my heart where my Collar lies.